go go go

i realized today that i rarely spend more than a few weeks in one place without some sort of road trip, cross country trip, across the world trip... so these last 2+ months (i know...it's not that long...:) mark a significant period of just being in one place without moving around and kind of being "grown up" with a job and whatnot. needless to say i'm itching to get away and woke up this morning so excited that i'll be GOING again.

i kind of have a split personality when it comes to going. i love staying home and being in my space with people that i love...but going seems to be in my blood and i cannot escape it. who knows if i'm this way because i've always been this way or my years at belhaven ingrained in me that art of moving from place to place without ever really settling down.

i've always thought that once i'm married with children and house i wouldn't feel the need to go, that i would finally feel "at home". i've been nannying for a french woman who lives here in SA and she said no, the need to go home, to travel and move never leaves. and there is always dissatisfaction because france is no longer home and san antonio just isn't it either. so perhaps we my need for travel can simply be translated as a search for home...if anything my life in san antonio has only fed my desire to go.

or maybe, looking at the big picture, it's just my destiny, my calling, my lot, whatever you want to call it, to travel, to move, to know different things so that i can truly appreciate the constants in my life...

my baby needs me. time to go

moving along

i look forward with great expectation

a new proffession

i am going to become a definitionist.

feb. 2009

just do it right the first time...it doesn't seem so hard, but in each moment of decision is the opportunity to walk in the valley or climb the mountain. the vision and dream of the mountain top fades so quickly. just letting life happen is so much easier than the upward journey we are called to. the plateaus are so far and few. yet if forced to give an answer i would easily admit the mountain tops are well worth it...it's hard to remember. the mountain peaks are there. hiding sometimes and impossible to see in the cloudiness of every day...but they are there.

you're my water
you're my wine
you are my whiskey from time to time
-otr